that time i... went back in time.



we make jokes about it all the time... 'in my former life, i...'; 'i had to have been a {fill-in-your-blank-here} in my past life!' but how many of us really believe in, or even know about past life regression? plr, for short, is the process of actually experiencing  those former lives. i first learned all about it while reading the wildly popular "many lives, many masters" book by dr. brian weiss, a little more than two years ago. it goes without saying that much of what he describes about his first forays into plr, captured my attention. for many reasons.

since about the time i recognized that i had a self, i've been drawn to the metaphysical. astrology. tarot. crystals. auras... my families' chosen christian faith just didn't explain life as i knew it, and my little brain just couldn't wrap around the biblical explanation of adam and eve and their two sons, one of whom, killed the other, yet still managed to populate the earth. yeah. so, while i pretended to believe the teachings shared with me, my heart was never in it. plus, the whole thing about going to heaven or hell never said anything about from which one we came...

i needed deeper meaning. something that made sense. an honest explanation of the concept of life and why, as a child, i actually remembered that i remember knowing what it's like to be bombed. call me crazy. many have come before you to say the same thing and i'm good with that. so. yeah. and other things that i remember remembering just don't make sense if you follow the whole life->death->heaven/hell thing. as i was considered weird enough to my family and friends, i kept those memories to myself without much hope for a real answer.

fast-forward thirty some odd years, there was dr. weiss's book. explaining those early remembrances. i was intrigued. my first sort-of plr was under dr. weiss' guidance. sort of. i am so not a baller like that. but there is a youtube video of a group session he held at omega. i tried it. got myself in a comfortable position. allowed my mind to relax under his hypnotic spell. (it really is hypnosis, so... there's that.) i admit that i was dealing with some serious doubt. but. i am surprised by what i experienced.

i won't name names because that's just not fair. and a little weird. but. the image that came to mind was myself and a former boss (as my mother) in an early english kitchen, complete with dirt floors. my mother was severely overweight and a drunkard. i was extremely ashamed of her. to the point that when i married my beloved (an ex of mine in this life), i cut her completely out of my life. i then died in childbirth, so there was that. and then it was over. just like that. and i remembered all that i saw, when he ended the hypnosis. freaking epic, man!

                                   image: cinemajaw

                                   image: cinemajaw

about two years after reading "many lives...", a dear friend of mine, courtney starkey, (uhh, who loaned me the book the first time i read it) trained with dr. weiss at omega and now offers plr in the washington, dc area. of course, i wanted to try it again and thanks to the travel gods, we were able to be in the same place at the same time, where i received my first individual session. we decided that the session should be held in a sacred place. an outdoor sacred place. brilliant!

despite courtney's incredibly soothing voice (think overnight dj), i initially just couldn't get into it. my mind was not relaxed at all. or my body. the sounds of nature all around were a killer distraction. along with those dang rocks! but she kept guiding and leading and eventually, i saw a little boy skipping through an aquarium. he was alone. and happy. this appeared to be middle twentieth century europe. the next scene was seeing everything destroyed. blown up. bombed. yeah. she asked if i wanted to stay there. uhh. no. so we moved on...

next, i saw myself as a large man with lots of tribal tattoos covering his body. i rowed a wooden canoe with two other people approaching an island. although tired from days of rowing, we, along with others in our fleet, began building structures from leaves and the likes and hunting for food, immediately upon arriving. i didn't recognize any of the people on the journey. i did, however, at the end of the journey, see that i was lonely throughout this entire life, due to fear of letting people get close. i even died a lonely death, by slipping into a crater. and that was that.

honestly, in this life, i have an intense fear of falling/heights. i hate driving and/or riding through mountains. i am not a fan of high rises and/or roller coasters. and the craziest thing about seeing my former self fall to death in a crater, is that i didn't know that it was a thing before the regression. lo and behold, a few days later, while out with other friends, we stumbled upon (no pun intended, for reals) a huge crater, where i learned that people do often fall into those things - especially during night walks (note to self...). of course, i learned this from a safe distance from the edge, as fear besieged my very being when we arrived to our destination... hmm.

initially, i pulled myself out of the "spell," but i felt slightly off - not fully present, clouded thoughts, still super relaxed - so courtney offered to perform her usual closing process. i am thankful that she did, because it worked wonders. my fog lifted and i remembered all that i saw very clearly. we discussed it a bit and i suggested that she provide the closing to all clients whether they think they need it or not, because no one wants to get be stuck in another life somewhere...

which leads us to my last regression session. because courtney is a dear friend of mine, she offered a skype session for me, once she returned home. as i was truly curious to whether we'd have the same or similar experience from a distance, we set up via skype. i admit that i didn't think it would work. but this time, i came a little prepared. i'd experienced (uhh...) experiences with people whom i am sure i knew from before. and so. there was that.

the skype session set up wasn't too different than the sacred site we'd chosen. save i got to chill in the comfort of my bed, versus my prior poor attempts to make rocks feel soft. after working out a few technical kinks, courtney's smooth voice served as my very own delorean. her words led me to think of that present situation bugging me...

       uh oh. i gotta get back in time. untouched and unfiltered.

this time, i had absolutely no problem entering a vision. it appeared to be eighteenth century ireland, where i, a very young woman, watched my dad ride off with a huge wagon overfilled with hay. i was left behind to tend to my mother, who, very sick, died a short time after. i recognized both of these beings immediately. and the crazy thing about it is that even though they don't know each other in this life, when i met the most recent one, i immediately saw them together. like on some soul mate ish. yeah. like that.

when my dad returned, we seemed to get along pretty well at first, but i flashed to him slapping my face with some force, and my leaving shortly thereafter. i ran away to marry a man whom i did not love, who appeared to be quite a wealthy landowner. while there, i fell in love with one of his farm hands, but did not act on it. still, my husband discovered the impending affair and put an end to my life. a blunt metal object (i think it was a shovel) to the back of my head did me in... the last vision was of my father at my funeral. the only person in attendance. how very sad...

i couldn't place the man that i married. his energy felt like two men that i've encountered in this life. energy that was violent and plain ol' ugly. men that this woman had the sense enough to stay the hell away from. and that farm hand... i don't believe that i've had the pleasure of meeting this beautiful man this go round (yet). but man, i'd love to. that smile. those eyes. his gentle nature... the evolved man, a few hundred years before his time...

i must admit. the distance session was the most powerful one i've experienced. i found myself crying and filled with so much emotion throughout. it felt incredibly real and again, it fit in with many of the things i've experienced in this life. guilt. abuse. blame. relationships for reasons other than love. it goes on. and it also cleared the questions i've had about connections to recent additions to my life. and afterwards, i've started having more memories/dreams of my eighteenth century irish life. of the abusive and controlling relationship i had with the soul who was my dad. vivid, painful memories of that relationship. parallels to today...

as i don't believe in coincidence - i can't help but be gripped by how these past visions are surely linked to my present experience. and how i've been able to take the information given from those visions and heal/correct certain situations that i'd been otherwise at a loss at getting through. this, to me at least, makes much more sense than the bible stories taught in my youth. i am very grateful for having an open mind and that i've been blessed with friends who are really good at offering such services.

if you're interested in having your own plr, you should get in touch with courtney. her website is there, you can learn more about plr and/or schedule an appointment for yourself. she will also be in hilo, hawai`i at the end of january. visit our coming events to find out more. i can't promise that you'll have the same experience that i had. i can promise that it will be helpful to you on your journey. and that you won't need a flux capacitor.